Every night, my Mom would sit on the side of my bed while I said my prayers. Every night the same prayer followed by asking God to bless everyone in our lives we could think of.

As a child, the “if I die before I wake” phrase didn’t have a ton of meaning for me. I didn’t know many kids who died in their sleep…or many kids who died for that matter. But, I grew up in a huge, extended family and a closely connected church and death was a part of our life. When you have that many aunts, uncles, cousins, and church family friends, you’re exposed to death from a young age. And my family was from the South, so funerals were huge, family occasions and we’d all travel for miles to be together.

The “if I die before I wake” phrase has been on my mind lately because of the number of people I’ve known, either personally or through friends, whose lives have been abruptly altered by death or life changing illness in the past year.

In December of last year, my oldest brother was planning to come for a visit to help me get my house ready to go on the market. He had to postpone his trip because of changes in his insurance that made it necessary to have surgery before the end of the year. He scheduled double knee replacement surgery for right after Christmas. Around the same time he found out he’d be having surgery, another sister in law found out she had terminal cancer and doctors predicted she’d only live another few months.

I live 3000 miles away from all of my family, so I decided it was time for a visit. I thought I could spend some time with my sister in law and be my brother’s cheerleader for a few days while he was going through rehab.

As is often the case, things didn’t work out quite as planned. My brother’s knee surgery went quite well, but when he woke up he didn’t know who or where he was and couldn’t communicate. In one of those rare “complications of surgery,” he had had a stroke. At age 63, this otherwise healthy and vibrant man’s life had changed forever. I was coming home the next week – not knowing what my experience of my big brother was going to be…

Each of my three brothers and my sister have a special place in my life – and David is my oldest brother. He was enough older than me that we really didn’t have any sibling rivalry stuff going on. He was the one who would play tea party with me, gave me an allowance from his first job when my parents couldn’t afford to – and would do 100 push ups when the ice cream truck came around to get me a free popsicle…(cool incentive from the ice cream “man,” don’t you think??)

I arrived the week after his surgery and had no idea the kind of experience I was about to have. I spent much of the next day with my sister in law. We laughed, hugged, said lots of “I love you’s,” and had a great time. I had no idea that when I left that afternoon, we’d never have another conversation. Two days later, she died with my brother and I by her side. 33 days from diagnosis to death. My brother, sister, nephew and his family all rallied around her for that final month and I’m sure she died knowing how much she was loved. She never thought she’d be leaving the planet at the age of 63…I wonder how she would have lived her life if she had known it would end so soon. Her early passing was a wake up call for me and I’m living my life even more consciously than I ever have before.

That experience would have been enough for the week, but I was there to see my brother too. My visit with him was nothing short of amazing. It was like listening to someone whose first language isn’t English – while they hunt for the right words to communicate their thoughts. He’d try out a word, we’d guess where he was going with it and piece together what he wanted to say. His story about his experience not being able to communicate after the stroke was moving and heartbreaking at the same time….but that’s a topic for another blog post.

My week was awesome, amazing, connecting, loving, challenging and, most of all, awakening! In my reflection and meditation time following all of this, I’ve given lots of thought to what I am here to do – and “if I should die before I wake” – what I will have left undone. This experience has renewed my commitment to work with people who know there is something bigger they’re supposed to do…people who know it is time for them to stop playing small – and step up and into who they’re called to be in the world.

If you don’t wake up tomorrow, what part of your mission on the planet will be unfinished? Where are you playing small? And when will you step into your greatness and your calling? Life is meant to be played “full out.” What’s holding you back?

I believe in you. And I’m here to help when you’re ready.

I’m not the person clients, friends or family call if they only want to hear “there, there!” Sure, I listen and empathize with whatever’s going on, but people call me when they want me to listen for where they’re holding themselves back from being who they are called to be in the world. They call me when they want help to “step up” and into their greatness.

I don’t believe any of us are called to be complainers and whiners or to be encouraged to wallow in our misery. Don’t get me wrong, I do believe in fully feeling our emotions and looking at what we can learn from every situation. And then I believe in “stepping up!”

Sometimes that means letting go of toxic people or jobs. Sometimes it means letting go of judgment, fear and playing “small.”

I believe that I get opportunities EVERY DAY to step up. The great lesson I learned this year is that “stepping up” doesn’t always require action on my part. I’ve accomplished so much in my life by powering through challenges – to the point where I’ve exhausted myself – body and soul! Now I know that sometimes “stepping up” into who I’m called to be requires that I “allow” more and “power through” less. “Stepping up” sometimes means saying no to projects, opportunities and people who drain me more than they feed me.

What would it mean for you to “step up” and into your greatness? What would you have to let go and what would you have to embrace?

I believe in you.

What I’ve discovered is that, for me, a balanced life (the way it’s traditionally been defined) is an illusion. If you think about it, any object you try to keep balanced is not moving. Not forward, not backward. Not sideways. It’s just not moving! Or if it moves at all, it stays in a tight little box – never upsetting the status quo! For me life isn’t about keeping everything the same…not moving…it’s not about balance. It’s about movement and growth.

I choose to live a life that’s constantly moving, changing and growing. It makes me happy. Living life in a tight little box? Not so much. Sometimes I’m really good at creating opportunities for change and personal growth myself…you know, the kinds of choices you have some control over…how and where I work and live, who I spend my time with, how I want to see the world…

And then sometimes the Universe throws me a curve ball that REALLY makes me go WAY out of my comfortable little box. Because even when I’m choosing those other opportunities for change and growth, I’m still choosing experiences where I can imagine the outcome and usually have some idea how to get there.

This summer I had one of those “curve ball” experiences. I had some blood work done – not because I thought anything was wrong, but just to see where my base levels were at this time in my life. A week later, I had a diagnosis of diabetes. I was told the disease was advanced enough that it was unlikely that I could reverse it by changing diet, exercise and lifestyle and that I needed medication. Wow – talk about being thrown off balance! I know what you’re thinking…I like my life off balance – what a great opportunity! Well, maybe you’re not thinking that…but after a couple of days, that’s exactly what I thought.

But those first couple of days were brutal. I felt like a failure. I felt like some weird, foreign thing was going on inside my body. I spent an entire day talking to friends who know a lot about healing diseases and illnesses. I researched on the internet. And I made some decisions.

In the end, I chose to be grateful for this new opportunity to create a new kind of balance in my life and body. I began looking at every part of my life – family, business, relationships. I removed stress in every area I could – and created a plan to deal with the rest. I changed how I eat. I changed how I exercise. I have a pretty positive outlook on the world, but I worked on that too. I gave myself 3 months to “get clean” before I agreed to go on medication. After 5 weeks, I started testing my blood sugar…and I’ve gotten “normal” results for the past two weeks. In November I’ll take another blood test that will tell me more definitively how successful my changes have been.

Life Balance? For me, life balance has a new definition. It’s about living in the “now” while taking care of the future. I knew I was at risk for diabetes and I didn’t take all the steps I could have to prevent this. I’m not the kind of person who lives with lots of regrets. I don’t look at the past and wish I could have done things differently. I’m living in the “now.” And I’m taking care of myself for the future.

Today, think about how you’re living in the “now” and what you’re doing to take care of the future. Whether it’s your business, your relationships, your mental and physical health…or the environment. What could you do today to live more in the “now?” What one thing could you do today to take care of your future?

What’s the Plan??

Though it could be a little annoying at times when we just wanted to have a leisurely Saturday morning WITHOUT A PLAN, I came to appreciate the way he saw the world when I launched my first business.

That’s when I realized that the key to success was in “the plan!” I watched many entrepreneurs develop their businesses with a “flying by the seat of my pants” philosophy. And, to be honest, I tried it for awhile too! Many self employed people have experienced short term success with this way of thinking. But ultimately it doesn’t lead to the kind of balanced life and long term success so many of us crave when we start our own businesses.

As my son Ben grew up, he continued to give me lessons on “the plan.” As a 14 year old, he was ready to earn his own money. He found the only place in our neighborhood willing to give a 14 year old a “real job” and he created a plan to get one!

When he decided he wanted to go to an Ivy League college, he again – you guessed it – created a plan to get there.

And now, he’s in a career that began with a dream and for which he created a plan…as one of his job responsibilities he provides support for the NASA shuttle launches…one of his childhood dreams!

I’m grateful to Ben for all the ways he showed me that having a plan matters. And for reminders that big dreams are worth working for!

So what’s YOUR plan for your business? Do you know what to do next to fulfill your dreams? Are you ready to let go of that “flying by the seat of your pants” mentality and truly embrace the idea that you own and run a business?! And that owning and running a business requires a plan?

How much more could you accomplish with a business and life plan? Could you have more money? More time off? Feel more fulfilled in your relationships?

Think about it. And make a plan to fulfill your dreams.

I believe in you.

Linda

He was asked about the secret to his success…he told the interviewer that if there was a secret to success, it was still that…a secret. He knew only one way to achieve success – and that was hard work and good choices.

That, in fact, it had taken him 20 years to become an overnight success!

I think too many entrepreneurs and self employed people expect too much, too soon, with too little effort. I’m all for finding the easy way to do things. I believe in leverage, virtual assistants, joint ventures and building a dream team to help you achieve YOUR dream!

And I believe in doing the right work at the right time. The most successful self employed people I know have a clear understanding of what work to do when. They do ONLY the work they love and delegate the rest. They take vacations. They enjoy their personal relationships. They are very focused on their highest payoff activities and know what’s important to them. They work hard at the things they do best.

And none of them learned how to do this overnight. Each of them had a dream that was so big, that they were committed to finding a way to make it work.

And none of them gave up at the first rejection or first obstacle.

If you’re beginning or growing a business…keep this in mind. What are the best choices you can make today to grow your business? Minute, by minute… ask yourself, what choice will move me forward?

Before you know it…you too will become an overnight success! (and it doesn’t have to take 20 years!!)

Need some help moving forward? Check out our Biz School and Dream Launch Groups!

http://www.launchmydreams.com

I believe in you!

Linda

When it seemed like all you had to do was send an email and sell an information product or put a sign in a yard and sell a house, many people forgot that there’s more to selling than that! In fact some business owners started their business during a boom time where they never had to learn anything about sales! These people were really just “order takers” and now that the New Economy requires some skills in sales, they realize they’ve never developed them!

Times have changed and unfortunately, many self employed people have not kept pace with what’s different now. Over and over again, entrepreneurs come to me saying “Believe it or not, I’m doing everything I did last year (when I made a lot of money!) and I’m just not getting the same result…what’s wrong?”

What’s wrong?? You’re kidding, right?? I’m all for not watching or listening to the news…but you must have been living under a rock for the past year if you haven’t heard one expert after another (including me) tell you that you MUST do things differently if you want to make as much money as last year. Last year’s strategies will not bring you last year’s income this year or next.

Not where you want to be this year? First take a look at where you are right now compared to where you wanted to be at this time. Be honest. Are you 50% down? 80%? Just be honest here. Now take a look at your work habits. Do you have the work habits of someone who’s making 100% or 150% of their goal?

Do a time study on yourself. From the time you get up to the time you go to bed, write down everything you do. Personal care, family time, “me” time, business. In the business category, record the amount of time you spend prospecting – actually asking for new business, taking care of current business, following up with past clients (and asking for new business or referrals), networking, strategizing, and whatever other category you think is meaningful in your particular business.

Do this for one week. Look at the number of waking hours you had for the week and calculate what percentage you spent in each category. I’ve had so many under-producing business owners complain to me about their 16 hour work days…until they do this time study! There’s hidden gold in this time study – just do it and you’ll see where your work habits aren’t what they need to be. It’s different for everyone – but it always comes down to one thing. Not asking enough of the right people enough different ways for their business…and offering them a solution to some pain or discomfort they feel.

After you’ve done the time study, plan out a 40 hour work week and, if you don’t have enough business, spend about 80% of your time prospecting. Then see what new work habits emerge after you try that for one week!

I believe in you. Whether you consider yourself an entrepreneur, an independent contractor or a small business owner, own a home based business or go to a brick and mortar business every day…if you don’t have enough business, you must do this time study to find out what to do next!

Linda

Do you tolerate disrespect from anyone in your life (including yourself!)?

Do you tolerate low expectations of yourself or others?

Do you tolerate relationships that drain you?

Do you tolerate making less money than you want?

When this concept of “tolerations” was first introduced to me, I really didn’t like it! I didn’t want to look at my relationships, my expectations, my way of being in the world and examine what I loved about my life and what I was merely tolerating…But I have to tell you there was incredible power in realizing what I had been tolerating and what it was costing me.

Just like not identifying a “Big Dream,” (see previous Blog post on this one!) many people don’t want to look at what they’re tolerating in their lives because they’re afraid they’ll have to take some uncomfortable action. And once again, I want to tell you the power is in simply identifying it – allowing yourself to see it. You don’t have to do anything about it if you don’t want to.

But noticing what “tolerating” costs you is incredibly powerful. For me the cost was in how I showed up in the world. I held back. I operated at a lower energy level than was natural for me. I kept myself from being the leader in my life I knew I was meant to be. My business didn’t grow to the level I wanted. I played small and safe. I felt lonely and isolated.

I didn’t have to change anything about these tolerations right away to see big results. First, I simply acknowledged they were there. Then, when I was ready, I could decide which ones needed to change. But I have to say the power was in just noticing what wasn’t where I wanted it to be in my life. The power was in being honest about how I was showing up in the world and what I was attracting into my life. First I had to acknowledge where I was…before I could decide how to get to where I wanted to be!

I believe in you! What are you tolerating that’s holding you back??

Linda

The first is that many people do not want to articulate their Big Dream! As I’ve explored the reasons for this, a common denominator seems to be emerging and it’s this: a fear of stepping up and into who they know they can and are called to be in the world. There’s a fear that articulating their Big Dream out loud requires them to take action. There’s a fear that they’ll have to make uncomfortable decisions, that their lives will never be the same again.

The truth is you don’t have to do anything! The real power comes from just saying it out loud to someone who accepts you and your dream without judgment. The real power is in giving voice to the dream and just allowing it to be. It’s incredibly freeing to try on our dreams and see if they fit when we say them out loud. Sometimes, after getting them out of our head, we realize that there’s something that’s not quite right about what we imagined when the dream was only unspoken. Maybe the dream is too small. Or the change it requires is too big for now!

Saying it out loud gives you the opportunity to play with stepping into your dream without taking any action. Try it on for a few minutes every day and see how it fits. Stand in front of a mirror and say it out loud to yourself…how does it feel in your body? What expression is on your face when you give it a voice? Don’t worry about “how” you’ll do it or what anyone else will think. Just take the first step and allow your dream to be spoken out loud.

Before you know it, you’ll have a dream you can believe in. A dream you feel confident stepping into. A dream that will guide all your decisions in your work and personal life.

I believe in you…Imagine a world where we all lived from that “Big Dream” place!

Linda

Launch My Dreams is the overall theme of the programs I’ll be rolling out over the next couple of years!

In the coming months, I’ll be announcing some amazing personal development courses. There will be online coaching groups, live events and e-courses on building community, parenting, teens, relationships…everything to support you living your life on purpose and with passion and joy!

Stay tuned for regular blog updates and inspiration for being all you can be…

I believe in you. I want to help you get from where you are today to where you want to be tomorrow.

Linda